Friday, November 6, 2009

Great Whites "Minding Their Own Business".

Marine biologists among your kind in Northern California announced this week that Great White Sharks swim much closer to shore than originally thought, including some that actually pass under the Golden Gate Bridge and enter San Francisco Bay. According to these so-called experts, this discovery, combined with the relatively low number of attacks on humans, proves that these sharks “are really minding their own business.” What! I have a news flash for these scientists; Great White Sharks are mindless eating machines, nothing more and nothing less: if you jump in the water near one you will be eaten. Period. The brain of a 20 foot, 2 ton female White Shark is the size of a human fist, and her entire body is simply a life support system for her mouth. I dare any scientist to come swimming with me off Año Nuevo Island, South Farallon Island, Point Reyes, or Tomales Point when these sisters are in town, anytime between September and Christmas, and we will see who minds whose business. By the way, the water is chilly so be sure to wear your wet suit—you know, the black one that has the word ‘lunch’ written on the back in indelible red ink. Minding their own business—give me a break!

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