Tuesday, March 23, 2010

All's Fair In Love And War. Not.

Paleontologists in Italy have analyzed the fossilized skeleton of a dolphin and determined that this ancient ancestor of mine was killed by a shark. By analyzing the teeth marks on the skeleton’s ribs they were able to determine, in gruesome detail, the size of the shark (big) and the nature of the attack (brutal). While this particular dolphin and shark are both extinct, their descendants obviously are not, and such horrific attacks on my kind by these mindless eating machines continue to this day. The only consolation that I take in this unpleasant reality is that my much larger cousins, the Offshore Orcas, delight in eating sharks, especially Great Whites. In addition, whenever we have the numbers in our favor, we dolphins kill every shark we encounter. What is it that you humans say, “All’s Fair in Love and War?” Well, in this case you are half-right. There is no love lost between dolphins and sharks. We are mortal enemies locked in a perpetual state of war. Our survival depends on killing them before they kill us. It is an unfortunate way to live, but then again, you humans know all about that, don't you.

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